I’ve lost three family members this year. 2023 has forced me to think more seriously about how to deal with death. The truth is I’m still working on it.

What I do know is that gratitude for my other family members being healthy is a valuable way to spend moments where they are doing well. Looking back on the good times, you’ll be glad that you grasped the significance of their presence while they were still around.

When family members die, there is grief, but also joy, in the present moment. No matter how hard life becomes, you will still need to do your tasks with full attention. Mindfulness can save you from the spiral of difficult feelings. It’s not a cure-all, but it is a way to understand reality deeply—and to touch it, no matter your mental state.

There is joy in every task, no matter how difficult the world around you may be. If you can do each task with your whole mind, body, and being, you touch the infinite. Breakfast becomes a never-ending sensory stretch of sky. Walking become the motion of gods. Packed into each experience is the opportunity to experience life deeply, and the chance to do so is bursting with benefits. One of those benefits is the ability to find peace in each moment.

When death comes for your family members, remember that mindfulness can help. The joy of the task coexists with the grief of the loss. And as you dive into each task, you touch the infinite. And this is a space where you rejoin your loved ones.